Frank's Dating Service

Results are being released slowly but surely...

Welcoming back all the members from the "good ol' days" and ready for some good ol' fashioned reminiscing.

Postby Lord Sesshoumaru » Sun Nov 16, 2008 7:49 pm

coolies \:D/ possible free stuff
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Postby Taq » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:06 pm

I filled out a form entering the original and was devastated when Frank came out with the matches & I wasn't listed. :lol:
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Postby Frank » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:33 pm

Taq wrote:I filled out a form entering the original and was devastated when Frank came out with the matches & I wasn't listed. :lol:

I was looking over the original topic and saw that, Taq...I'm so sorry for my oversight all those years ago! :mecry:

The applications have all been filed, and, with white board marker in hand, Frank sits down for a few intense hours of determining God's will. O:)

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Postby KODY 105 » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:36 pm

Frank wrote:The applications have all been filed, and, with white board marker in hand, Frank sits down for a few intense hours of determining God's will. O:)


I don't think you should joke about determining God's will. That appears irreverent.
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Postby BrokenButBeautiful » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:36 pm

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! You had to show my name!

I may have a jealous finance on my back soon, thanks to that! lol.

Jelly is a very jealous person..

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Postby Lord Sesshoumaru » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:38 pm

I find it funny that there's more girls on that board then guys.
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Postby InHisArms » Sun Nov 16, 2008 8:48 pm

DON'T PUT ME WITH JED!!! :mad:
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Postby Kairi » Sun Nov 16, 2008 9:11 pm

Can't wait for the results, Frank! \:D/
I'll catch up to Bren!
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Postby Ruthie » Sun Nov 16, 2008 9:42 pm

BrokenButBeautiful wrote:I may have a jealous finance on my back soon, thanks to that! lol.



Mmmm....I'm sure your money is quite the jealous character. ;)
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Postby jelly » Sun Nov 16, 2008 9:51 pm

BrokenButBeautiful wrote:AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! You had to show my name!

I may have a jealous finance on my back soon, thanks to that! lol.

Jelly is a very jealous person..

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Postby Trent DeWhite » Sun Nov 16, 2008 10:02 pm

Frank wrote:The applications have all been filed, and, with white board marker in hand, Frank sits down for a few intense hours of determining God's will. O:)

It's so comforting knowing we have such a wise and sensible person responsible for determining God's will for our lives. :inlove:
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Postby Frank » Sun Nov 16, 2008 10:18 pm

Trent DeWhite wrote:
Frank wrote:The applications have all been filed, and, with white board marker in hand, Frank sits down for a few intense hours of determining God's will. O:)

It's so comforting knowing we have such a wise and sensible person responsible for determining God's will for our lives. :inlove:

My urim and thummim have been put to good use tonight. ;)
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Postby LizzieG » Sun Nov 16, 2008 10:21 pm

I'm excited to wait up tomorrow and find out my fate-err, destiny.

And that is quite probably the most amazing use of a whiteboard that I have ever seen! \:D/

EDIT: I am quite a catch, as evidenced by my lovely avatar *points*
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Postby Frank » Sun Nov 16, 2008 10:54 pm

The Frank's Dating Service (FDS) results will be released slowly over the next few hours. \:D/

Not wishing to offend anyone (or God), Frank recommends that everyone read the FDS official disclaimer located on the first page of this topic. In all silliness, these results and all of Frank's commentary must be taken "with a grain of salt"…i.e. please don't take it completely to heart, and please know that everything said by Frank in this topic is (and will continue to be) said in loving jest. :D

The results are in, my lovely applicants, and the couples are going to announced them one by one, in the style of a runway show, with my delightful commentary following. \:D/

Presenting our first lovely couple: Bmuntz and Kit Kat!
"What first drew me to this match were their highly compatible levels of wisdom and insight. Bmuntz's first wish was to put all the animals on the train and send them off to church to work out their differences there, leading to a peaceful and chasing-free environment; Kit Kat, on the other hand, took a more metaphysical and Pythagorean approach to the question and stated that the train should be painted a 'deep purple,' which is the color derived from the number 5. Their AIO couple choices also make for a delightful contrast: Bmuntz chose a more obscure couple (Dan Williamson and Cheryl McCormick), but Kit Kat chose the most concrete couple in AIO (Whit and Jenny). I see their happy marriage consisting of long nights watching baseball together while joyously discussing the different textual criticism arguments in various Family Portraits album scripts. I wish them all happiness."

Second to the runway is: Pseudonym and Catspaw!
"Seeing how Catspaw favors the most loving couples with only the highest levels of mutual affection (Catspaw's favorite AIO couple: Donna and Rodney), I was delighted, nay, exuberated to pair her up with one of the most attractive and affectionate boys on the ToO, Pseudonym. Pseudonym adds another can of worms to their pile of wedding gifts by naming his ideal AIO couple as 'Regis Blackgaard and Margaret Faye,' which only clinches the perfection between him and our lovely admin. Though Catspaw's FDS application contained gushing remarks about the Jack of hearts and some casual references to someone named 'Shadowpaw,' it didn't seem right to match her with anyone except someone who spend the rest of his life answering her deep and probing questions with: 'False.' (as was Pseudonym's answer to question number three) I'm sure that these two will spend a very happy life together. Mazel tov."

Due to an imbalance in the numbers of male and female applications, I have decided (in order to not exclude anyone) to give some of the men several choices in perfect companions. They can either chose one of the two, or just take all my suggestions and practice the ancient tradition of polygamy (which is not expressly forbidden in the Scriptures, I might add.). ;) That being said, the next man on our list is Me, to whom I am recommending the choices of V-Lady or H Tide!
"As the thunderous applause dies down, I would like to say a few words about Me. Me is a man of very few words. Even his FDS application contained only enough words to fill one and a half baker's dozens. But, though virtually silent, the few words that do come from his fingertips are always fraught with meaning and, redemption. He stated his favorite AIO couple as 'Eugene and Katrina, of course!' Oh, how two simple words can be so telling! What can the 'of course' part of his answer mean except that Me yearns for an intelligent and sensible girl to come into his lonely and technology-filled existence! His whole life is encapsulated in the character of Eugene, and within his essence is found the struggles that have played out again and again during the course of the Meltsner legacy. The other part of Me's FDS application that was so terribly touching was his answer to number three, which read, simply: "Grape KoolAid." What tenderness and compassion is found in this priceless gem of a fellow! When asked what color to paint the train, Me's only thought is for the raging thirst of the hard-working painters who are poised, ready and waiting, for the announcement of the appointed color! And what a delightful choice of electrolyte-filled beverage to choose for those who are to labor in the heat of the midday sun under his command! Such an outstanding citizen of the ToO deserves only the best of choices for a partner, and I have selected only the best for his consideration:

V-Lady's answers in her FDS application proved stunning, and a great evidence of her own thoughtfulness and caring heart. In her answer to question number three, V-Lady stated that the delight of her heart would be to paint a picture of a cat chasing a dog, a mouse, and a bird on the train…something new for people to look at as the train goes by.' Like Me, her thoughts do not immediately settle on what color she wants to paint the train, but take a more environmentally friendly and pro-artisan spin on the entire question! In her concern for the dangers of helpless animals chasing one another in busy train stations, V-Lady chooses to sacrifice all of her own preferences for paint colors and patterns for her wish to make all those in the station aware that animals can get hurt if they chase each other around heavy machinery. Her wish to have this 'mural' of sorts to be painted on the side of the train will naturally require the labors of a local artist, which will result in the boosting of community moral and unity. I think that V-Lady will prove very inspirational to Me.

H Tide is my second candidate for Me's consideration. Her FDS application answers were very compatible to Me's in both length and insight. H Tide chose 'Mandy and Trent' as her favorite AIO couple, with the emphatic remark that she loves 'cuteness.' Well, search no more for cuteness, H Tide, for I have found you one of the cutest. H Tide's answer to question number three was also very sweet: "Blue, cause I'm like Connie." Ah, the sweet sound of the cries of young women whose emotions can be described by the color of the sky, coming to me asking for advice about their hopelessness in finding a suitable companion who will provide direction and meaning to their life. Who better to help her on her search for meaning than someone as smart and as captivating as Eugene? I believe that H Tide and Me's future together would be filled with tasteful bantering, sweet romantic walks around Trickle Lake, and lots of cute photo booth pictures."

Fourth for our runway is: Mr. Whit and Iron & Light!
This is a wonderful match. Both of these fine people expressed a fondness for the color black, and similar taste in colors is always a must for good companionship. Iron & Light expressed a wish to paint the train black, while Mr. Whit chose the "Black Jack" as his favorite card game. I see their evenings together filled with wonderful music (Mr. Whit's answer to number three espoused this aspect of their relationship with his incomplete sentence: 'Cry'n Bryan Dern on polka night.'), and fast-paced card games. Mr. Whit is obviously in this relationship for the 'long term' (even to old age!), having stated that his favorite AIO couple is Tom and Agnes. And, we needn't worry about Iron & Light, for she'll always be able to hold her own (when disagreeing with Mr. Whit on which music CD to put in next) with the (Jack of) clubs that she always keeps handy. Congratulations, you two."

The fifth set of people on our list is: Prince Ace Heart, with his potential companions, Scarlett O'Hara or Lady Simbelmyne!
"This one was a hard decision…very hard. But, I had to find the perfect husband for either of these two lovely ladies, and I believe that I've found him. Prince Ace Hearts is a man of order, and with a firm opinion and cleverness of speech. Let me quote to you his answer to number three: "I’d be chasing the 1st mouse who is on the 2nd dog who is barking at the 3 birds that are sitting on 4 trains to which the 5 cats are climbing." How delicately phrased, how delightfully worded! Prince Ace Hearts was also very certain about his favorite playing card, and was therefore equally certain about his favorite Jack: Hearts (no surprise there…). I admire this in a man, and so am matching him with Lady Simbelmyne and Scarlett for the following reasons:

1. Lady Simbelmyne has put forth a stunning profile within her FDS application answers, displaying her exquisite taste for excitement and national-intelligence related adventuring (which is evidenced by her choice of favorite AIO couple: Jason and Tasha)! For such aspirations, a partner of the utmost cleverness and solidness of convictions is needed. A future for Lady Simbelmyne with Prince Ace Heart would consist of searingly engaging photo compositions, featuring the stunning gorgeousness of Simbel, poised for action, with the stern yet dazzlingly breath-taking composure of the all-protective Prince.

2. Scarlett O'Hara presents a delightful contrast to Prince Ace Heart's somewhat stoic tendencies, and brings in the sweetness and quirkiness of favoring 'Whit and Jenny' (for their passionate romance!) as well as a desire to paint the train the color '5' (which apparently used to be her favorite color). A future with Scarlett and Prince would be filled with stunning appearances at regal dinner parties, with the delicate fairy-like Scarlett entering the room on the noble arm of her dark and serious Prince."
Last edited by Frank on Mon Nov 17, 2008 12:05 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Postby Iron and Light » Sun Nov 16, 2008 11:07 pm

Hmm.... I think you missed someone on that list :-k. I think COT had wanted to be a part of your lovely service \:D/.

Oh- and cheers to the lovely pairs you produced :yes:.
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Postby Frank » Sun Nov 16, 2008 11:09 pm

Iron and Light wrote:Hmm.... I think you missed someone on that list :-k. I think COT had wanted to be a part of your lovely service \:D/.

Unfortunately, I didn't recieve an application from COT, and so wasn't able to put him onto the white board of eligible applicants. :(

And unfortunately, I have not the mental capacity to write out the rest of the matches tonight, and so y'all can wait with baited breath for the rest of the FDS results, which will be released tomorrow night (Sorry LizzieG, I hope you're not heartbroken when you don't find your soulmate tomorrow morning!). Thanks for participating, and enjoy your winter weather! :D

Love, Frank.
Last edited by Frank on Mon Nov 17, 2008 12:30 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Robo » Mon Nov 17, 2008 12:28 am

I'm sending entry. Just for the mel of it.

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Postby Kairi » Mon Nov 17, 2008 1:05 am

Tomorrow night? I have to wait until tomorrow night?? :x
;)

Those were awesome, Frank! Can't wait for tomorrow. Catspaw and Pseudonym are quite the fetching couple. :badgrin:
I'll catch up to Bren!
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Postby JED » Mon Nov 17, 2008 5:56 am

Kit Kat wrote:DON'T PUT ME WITH JED!!! :mad:


:sick: Yuck!

I am quite insulted am I that how do you put it.... undesirable? :noway:
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Postby LizzieG » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:48 am

You are forgiven, Frank, but only because the already-released results were so entertaining to read. :lol:

*is sad she won't be able to make an "I Love Me" t-shirt* \:D/
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