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 Post Post subject: The Odyssey Times :: Issue 15!!!
Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 9:36 pm 
sn33ky hobbitses
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Preeeesenting... Issue 15 of the Odyssey Times!!! Lucy steps back, as a huge holographic image of an Odyssey Times issue appears, hovering above the anticipating crowd. After waiting for a moment, Lucy opens her mouth:
*cough* *cough*...but... doesn't that look nice? :sniff:
The audience applauds, and Lucy is very happy.

No use keeping you waiting! Introducing the massive amounts of articles and stories you've all been waiting for!! :D

The crowd cheers and claps as two gigantic doors in the wall slowly slide open to reveal a hi-techy printing room with uncountable stacks of freshly printed issues.

Enjoy!! :) Oh! By the way, there are a few ads along the way that you might be interested in looking at! Applause for Agent DeWhite, the one who did it all!



~*~*~*~

The Odyssey Times Apprentice: Becoming an Odyssey Times Writer Update!
Image Written by AIOFan11, one of the awesome people who helped bring the Times all back together again! :D

The Odyssey Times (OT) last two editions, 14 and 15 have both included a few articles from different Times writers. Wondering why? In Edition 12 we introduced the newest contest of the Times: "Odyssey Times Apprentice: Becoming an Odyssey Times Writer." In Edition 13 we announced Hakeber, Kenric (or Citrus Basil), Eugene Kendall (Eon Spitfire something...), Elf of Rivendell, and Forever_Faithful, all of the people who entered, became apart of the Apprentice contest. They will be in three editions, writing three to four articles each. We are very excited to have them apart of the writing team, even for a few weeks! After edition sixteen the Apprentices' will be removed from the Odyssey Times forum (where we work on the upcoming articles) and we, the writers who put on the Odyssey Times, will decide a first place winner, second place winner, and a third place winner. We are considering the winners receiving money as part of their prize, but it is not set in stone as of now.

Thanks to all of the faithful ToO readers of the Odyssey Times for making the Apprentice contest a huge success!

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The Old Gower Road Explained--an unofficial non-guide
Image By the Elf of town! Yay!! :D

Greetings, newbie. Welcome to the Town of Odyssey--a place of fun, adventure, and excitement! Enjoy your stay, er, permanent residence here.
...Muahahahaha.
*gates clang shut*

Well, now that you’re here, I suggest you introduce yourself. NO! Not in Finneman’s Market, of course. If you do that, your introduction post shall be moved to the Steps of City Hall. Yes, thank you. Now watch all the welcomes flood in. Don’t you feel good now?
Now, on with the tour. You can read all the flattering comments later.

A very popular segment of the Town of Odyssey is the Old Gower Road. Perhaps it’s unconventional to start our tour there, but it certainly will be an interesting experience.

I suppose I should take you to Hillingdale Haven first. Oh, don’t worry, the inmates won’t bite. I am one too. Eh…don’t look at me like that. You’ll be one soon, you know. I said, don’t look at me like that! It’s quite a fun place. Over there in that corner, you can see a few inmates sitting around a table. They’re counting to a billion. Why? Beats me. It takes them quite a while to get to the next number—at this rate, it’s going to take them about 555,554 years to get to a billion.

All the flowers you see strewn on the floor are the remains of the wedding craze that swept the Haven a couple of weeks ago. (I take it Bernard hasn’t paid his weekly visits yet.) Eugene Kendall and Sonuna Hydris, Forever_Faithful and J-man, Top and Continental Admiral… well, on second thought, you may not want to know much more about this.

Moving on. Gower’s Field is a great place to have fun. All this…empty…nothingness. Why, you can build imaginary cities, fortresses, landscapes, entire worlds… anything! It’s just all imaginary. That battle over there? Those are the Blackgaards and Black, engaged in “mortal” combat. Strange groups of people, both of them—constantly at each others’ throats, handguns always concealed behind their backs. Over there on the other side, a quest is going on. Its objective is to find a rainbow-coloured gem, apparently. Anyway, the games in this field seem to vary greatly.

See? Depending on the game, you can even drop a nuke or walk through solid walls without a single injury!

And finally, Odyssey 105—the place for contests. Avatar contests and signature contests seem rather common. There’s the occasional writing contest (big one going on right now) and art exhibition. A new scratchcard kiosk opened up recently. And you can even pay people to have your username ruined, too! Why anyone would do that is beyond me, but oh well. Those aren’t real gallows, by the way. It’s just a slightly more real-life version of Hangman.

And that’s where I’ll leave you today—be sure to retain that spark of insanity! Knock yourself out. (Even literally, if you wish—and if you’re in Hillingdale.)

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Hillingdale Haven: Folly or Fun?
Image By Forever Faithful who is now Sarai Binghamton and makes very good siggies! :D

Everyone enjoys a bit of fun, right? Well, the Hillingdale Haven offers a LOT of fun! In fact, most people who regularly visit this fine establishment for ordered insanity are always coming back for more. What could be wrong with constant hilarity, where inside jokes abound and outside jokes make people laugh until their sides ache? After all, God wants us to be fun and happy, right?

To that, yes. God does want us to have fun. He wants us to be happy. But there's a time for silliness, as well as a time to be serious. In Proverbs, God warns us against folly: thinking everything is a joke, and not taking anything seriously. 'Where words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.' Proverbs 10:19 says. Ephesians 5:4 says that there shouldn't be any obsenity, foolish talk, or coarse joking in our speech, but instead thanksgiving.

Ecclesiastes 3 puts it well. 'There is a time for everything, a time for every activity under the sun.' There's a time to be extremely random and goofy, and a time to take things seriously. There's a time to see everything as funny, and there's a time to stop and be sober. There's a time to talk - and a time to be quiet. Moderation, they say, is the key to happiness.

So what will you do about this? Maybe some of you are saying, "Hey, that sounds like you're about to ask Shadowpaw to ban Hillingdale Haven altogether!" But all I'm saying is that hopefully we'll know when to stop. God wants us to be truly happy - he's truly happy when we are. But our happiness shouldn't get in the way of obeying his word - when it does, we are simply following our own pleasures instead of God. So what's more important? Getting a laugh, or obeying God's word that says that where words are many, sin is not absent? I hope you make the right decision today!

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An Interview with Me!
Image By EK, the ToO Nutcase!!! :D


This week for the Odyssey Times I interviewed Me, no not you, not myself...but Me. ;)
EK
I hear you are in the business of professional Video Editing, could you tell our readers a little about what you do?
Me
Well, it's actually a little more than editing, although that does play a large role. I do professional video production for a variety of clients. I'll get a call or an email about an event, where someone wants some production done. I'll then spend the next few weeks talking with them about the job and working out details. Then when the day rolls around, I'll go and shoot the event. Then comes the editing. Most jobs are just basic camera switching and dumping to DVD, but there are some jobs that require more. On the fun jobs, I'll actually have to put together a variety of sources to tell a story of some sort. That is the part I really enjoy. There's something exciting about it, that I love.
EK
Wow, I hope you get that story to us! That would be great for the Odyssey Times. Your also a gamer, what games do you like to play?
Me
I play a wide variety of games. Perhaps my favorite genre is Real Time Strategy, of which Command and Conquer Generals Zero Hour is my favorite. But really, I'll play just about anything. At the moment I'm playing MapleStory, one of the only recent games that will actually run on my laptop (gaming computer is under the weather ATM).
EK
So, you play Maplestory? What kind of game is that?
Me
It's an MMORPG (Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game), which you also play, EK. It's the first 2D side-scrolling game of this type that I have ever seen. Quite fun. And yes, rope hax are 1337.
EK
Yes, rope hax are quite leet. What is your favorite podcast?
Me
TWiT (this week in tech), of course. Just a bunch of guys talking about tech stuff. And laughing at John C. Dvorak is always fun.
EK
What do you think about starting a ToO Podcast where its just a bunch of guys talking about ToO stuff?
Me
Lol. That would be awesome. I would listen regularly.
EK
But what do you think about being one of the guys sitting around talking?
Me
Then I could use my exciting radio announcer voice! \:D/
EK
:O You are so like going to be the Leo type guy that says, "Welcome to TWiT, this week in ToO" ;). So now for the last and must overused question...what CD is in your CD player right now?
Me
Well, I don't really use a CD player. I have a portable one, but I think it's hiding in my closet somewhere. So would you like to know what is in my playlist?
EK
Sure thats about the same thing. ;)
Me
At the moment, it's Sea of Faces by Kutless. Not their best album, IMO, but it does have some good songs.
EK
Awesome! Well thanks for doing this interview with me, and we hope you like the next edition of the Odyssey Times. :D
Me
You're welcome!

And for all you kids at home, remeber to eat food. It's yummy.

And... since this is free airtime... let me tell you about a sale we're having on our color television sets.



Well there we have it folks, Me! Also if you want to know about the ToO podcast just PM me and ill fill you in on when we record and such. Be looking for the premiere episode soon. :D

Image

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The Crestwood Avenue Guide For Kiki!
Image By Lucy Pevensie, ToO twin of Lucy!

Note by Lucy: Since we’re having an ads column this week, I figured maybe a list of shops in Crestwood Avenue might go well! :)


*tape starts rolling* *jazz is blaring in the background*
“Goooood morning every one! Yes, today’s the big day! Welcome to Kiki’s Exciting Adventures!!! Join Kiki the monkey in his exciting adven–” *bleep*

“*cough* Excuse me. Lucy Pevensie here! This article here is like a little guide to the shops around town! I hope it helps, and I apologize for the weird recording.”

It was a bright, sunshiny afternoon, and Kiki the monkey danced along the streets of Crestwood Avenue, exploring every single shop that came into view.

Oooh. There’s a giant tree. It’s a white tree. (Well, maybe. Look Gandalf.) The huge tree had several words engraved in it’s bark: The ToO Family Tree. Many people flocked towards the tree where an elf stood. And what was she doing…? Interested, Kiki entered the throng.

“Yay! I have another sister!” “I will never make or force Monday to do dishes!” “It’s just one big happy family!” “Yay, hugs all around!”

Nevermind. Kiki was very confused. He never was really that brilliant. Waddling out of the crowd, Kiki continued his trek through Crestwood…

--------

If you don’t like annoying monkeys invading town, please forget about the above short story, and let’s move onto the body of this article! This article was made to help you get around Crestwood Avenue. (It will be a two part article most probably, as there are many shops)

Here is a list of all (at least all the ones that haven’t been closed) the shops in Crestwood Avenue. They are categorized, so hopefully, it won’t be too hard to find a shop you’re looking for! (For those of you who can’t find your shop here, it might be that it’s not on the first page or it might be because you have two shops. If it’s past the first page or you have more than one shop, I probably haven’t put it on the list… sorry.)

NOTE: Shops marked with a little red asterix (This thing -> * ) will mean that the owner of the shop has not been too active in the Town of Odyssey lately, so you probably won’t receive your order quickly.



*~Graphics(Signatures – Avatars – Misc.)~*

AREM Free Signature and Avatar Creation
Agent Robert Mitchell(owner of this shop) makes great signatures! Brother of Forever_Faithful/Sarai Binghamton. :)

anyone want avatars or signatures come here for any kind of(King Kong Skater’s shop)*
*I haven’t seen any of his work yet and don’t know much about him, so unfortunately, this one will go without comment* =( :(

The Blackgaard Gallery
The newest shop in town! :D I think. Owned by the Blackgaards, mainly Felicity! \:D/

Chandler’s Graphics Design Center!
This is a great store, and I highly recommend it! The quality of the graphics are extremely good, and you will most probably get your order back posthaste (I’ve ordered before)! \:D/

ConnieK’s sig shop
Connie makes very cool signatures, and not only signatures, but avatars as well! She is very generous(she gave me a Lucy Pevensie banner for free just when I was looking for one as a present to celebrate my being twins with Lucy :D).

Custom Animated Blob Avatars!
These blob avatars are very cute, and are quickly getting popularity! :D

Dancer’s Designs*
Dancer’s designs are very original, and she did a lot for the elections(Especially the one when Catspaw and Bmuntz won)! :)

Ekv2’s Super Shop-ish Thing
EK’s shop!(And that means a lot, you know. ;) ) Makes very cool signature tags… …and it’s version 2!! O:)

Everything You Need!*
Eugene’s shop! You can get everything from G-mail accounts to avatars! :)

Free Animated Avatars and Signatures – AND OTHER NEW ITEMS!
Alex’s shop is great to go to if you’re looking for cool animations! :D

Graphics Design for Free!
Forever_Faithful/Sarai Binghamton’s shop, and one of the most popular. F_F has great designing skills! :D

Joeys Siggy Shop
Great shop, with neat animations. You can get your first five for free! :D

JTMCGEE’s shop! *
If you’re looking for help with website coding, JTMCGEE just might be able to help you out! :D

Lady Simbelmynë's Doll Shop
The only doll shop in town, this shop is great. You can order animated swinging dolls, or just cute little dolls! :D

~*~Lucy P’s Graphics Shop~*~
This is my (Lucy Pevensie’s) shop… I don’t know whether it’s considered good or bad… But I can tell you that ordering won’t be too hard, since I’ve made a form for you to pm me or post on the topic, so that I can make your graphic easily. :)

The Odyssey J-Siggy Shop
J-man is a great siggymaker, and a master of GIMP! You can count on him to make awesome graphics!

OneWay’s Avatars! *UPDATED*
One Way makes avatars of variety, so if you want unique, cool avatars, this is the way to go!

Skaterfreaks Skateboard Shop
A great shop for all skateboard lovers! All you skater people should check it out sometime. :)

And now, before I conclude Part I of the Crestwood Avenue Guide, here’s one great little store I’m sure all of you have seen before…

Sunday’s Emporium
A spectacular shop where you can send people presents through Sunday’s Emporium! Send people birthday, Christmas, and just friend presents! Give, give, GIVE! :)

-*End of Part I*-

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Image By Frank! To be quite frank, I think Frank's service is perfect! :D

Image
Tralala, what a sweet ad. Isn't Honest Erwin's the greatest ever?
And that big "thumbs up" hand in the middle there...if that doesn't glow
with honesty, I don't know what does. :D


Frank's AIO Ad Making Service likes suggestions! You want more ads? You give her suggestions! (It's that simple.)
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JOSEPH IN EGYPT
Written by Hakeber! Great job, Hakeber!

This account of my life as a slave and prisoner in Egypt begins when Father had another one of his errands for me. At this time I was living with my family in Canaan. He sent me to Shechem to check on my brothers, who were herding the sheep there. I went to Shechem, and found out from someone that my brothers were in Dotham. I then went to Dotham. I saw them and went towards them. I heard them say,

“There comes the dreamer.”

What I think they were referring to was two dreams I had obtained and revealed unto them. The first was all about sheaves of wheat. My brothers and I were binding sheaves in the fields, and then suddenly my sheaf arose, and stood upright. All their sheaves then bowed down before mine. The second dream was about the sun, moon, and eleven stars bowing down and worshipping me. Of course my family, especially my brothers, didn’t like the idea at all.

Then Father made me this coat of many colors. In those days, the variety of colors on your coat sort of displayed your social status. I was treated better than my other brothers, and my brothers were jealous. I will not go into that at the present moment.


Anyway, when I came near them, they grabbed me and took my coat away. They lowered me into a dried well. I heard some conversation going on up there. It was scary. They were debating whether or not to kill me. Then when they sat down to eat, a band of Ishmaelites approached. I smelt the delicious scents of spices, balm, and myrrh. I heard them say they were going down to Egypt. I heard Judah say:

“What profit is it if we kill our brother, and hide his blood? Come, and let us sell him to the Ishmaelites, and let not our hand be upon him; for he is our brother and our flesh.”

All my other brothers agreed, and they lifted me out of the pit and sold me to the Ishmaelites for twenty pieces of silver: and they brought me into Egypt. And they sold me into Egypt to Potiphar, an officer of Pharaoh's, and captain of the guard.
God was with me and he blessed me, and I was prosperous. When Potiphar saw that the LORD was with me, and I was in his good books, and served him well, he made me overseer over his house, and everything that he had he put into my hand. I was well favored in the house of Potiphar.
Then one day, I made the wise decision to stay out of trouble. And for all that I was sent to the Pharaoh’s jail. I was blamed for something I did not do. Unjustly, I was now left in this dungeon, pondering in my mind how in the world, why in the world, did God let this happen. Little did I know about the great plan he had in store for me.
God was with me during the time I was in jail. He showed be mercy and gave me favor with the jail keeper. The jail keeper gave me a few responsibilities and put me in charge of the prisoners. After a few days, the jail keeper did not need to oversee my work, for the Lord was with me, as He was with me in the house of Potiphar. Everything I did, the Lord made it prosper.

One day, there were two new men in the jail. As I got to know them, I found out that they were servants of Pharaoh. The first man was the chief cupbearer, and the other the chief baker. They had somehow caused Pharaoh to be angry, and were both sent to jail.

That night, they both had strange dreams, and they were perplexed over the meaning. The cupbearer was the first to tell his dream to me.

“In my dream a vine was before me; And in the vine were three branches, and it budded, and her blossoms shot into view; and the clusters brought into view ripe grapes. And Pharaoh's cup was in my hand: and I took the grapes, and pressed them into Pharaoh's cup, and I gave the cup into Pharaoh's hand.”

And I replied: “The three branches are three days, and within three days shall Pharaoh lift up your head, and restore you unto your place: and thou shall deliver Pharaoh's cup into his hand, after the former manner when you were his butler. But think of me when it shall be well with you, and show kindness, I beg you, unto me, and mention me to Pharaoh, and bring me out of this house: For without a doubt I was stolen away out of the land of the Hebrews: and here also have I done naught that they should put me into jail.”
When the chief baker saw that my interpretation was good, he said to me,

“I also was in my dream, and, behold, I had three white baskets on my head, and in the highest basket there were many pastries for Pharaoh; and the birds ate them out of the basket which was on my head.”

And I answered: “The interpretation of this dream is that within three days shall Pharaoh hang you, and the birds shall eat thy flesh from off your body.”

And all that I said would happen came through. The cupbearer was restored to his position, and the baker was hanged.

_____________________________________________________


The Dog Town Saga Also by Hakeber!

There was a dog town that was ruled by dogs. There were dogs, dogs, and only dogs. Dogs ruled, dogs judged, dogs imported illegal Australian Lamb. Mayor G. Dane often took advantage of kangaroo meat too. Those dingoes were getting rich, I must say.
.
I, Mini Mui Pinscher, own a butchery shop on West Street. I was chopping up some lamb meat, you see, when young Laddy came to my store. Laddy was a Labrador retriever: Ten times my size. His Father owned the Labrador Bakery Shop.
"Yo, Aunt Mini, I’d like to buy me Mamma some of that lamb steak, will yous? I got ten pawbucks."
"Yes, Laddy. It's booked. You're Mamma came by just now. She's cooking steak tonight. She says she’ll pick it up later but I guess she asked you."
"I’m surprising her by doing it for her.”
"Here's her package."
"I wish I could eat it!"
"If you bite that your mum might call the GS Police Force!!"
"Why? I hate those snobby German Shepherds, always in the law or something. Oh, except for Granny Cutie. She makes wonderful egg shell and chicken porridge."
"If you eat that, you’ll catch fire! I know! I ate it before!"
"How much pepper is in there, anyway?"
"This morning I soaked it three hours in cayenne pepper, and another three in normal black pepper, and another three in white pepper. Not to mention I just dipped it in pure Cayenne."
"Where is the Dalmatian Firefighter Force? There's a 101 of them!"
"I quite forgot. But pepper is a different hot."
"But I think I'll catch fire if I eat'm anyway."
"That's right. Now go home!"
Laddy walked home and gave the pepper steak to his mother. She said he was good lad for helping her when he wasn't asked, and popped a sausage in his mouth.
"Now go along to school. Mr. Selby Trifle will get angry if you're late. You are learning from a great talker y'know."
"I can talk!"
"All dogs can, now because of him. Mayor Dane crowned him Sir Selby Trifle yesterday. But remember, our old dog language is just as important."
"Yes, Mum."
"Don't forget to go to Physical Education. Today's lesson is nipping at thieves with Mr. Crusher. Then go to Mr. Buster's class."
"Mr. Buster is my favorite teacher! He 's a detective!"
"I think it's nice of Mr. Buster to give detective lessons at your school. Here’s your lunch, got you bag?"
“Yes and Thanks Mum! I have my bag with me! Bye Mum!
"Bye Laddy, and remember, be honest!"
"You can't imagine how I've been today."
And Laddy was honest alright, he didn't eat the steak. And as the wise Mexican Hairless, I mean Chihuahua, always said:
Don't Eat the Steak, Your Honesty's at Stake

Image

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Verse of the Week
Image By Lucy Pevensie

Where words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise. Proverbs 10:19


I hope you enjoyed reading another issue from the Odyssey Times!! :D

~*~*~*~*~

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Last edited by Lucy Pevensie on Thu Mar 02, 2006 7:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 9:55 pm 
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Wow, great edition! \:D/ Yay! I really enjoyed Frank's ad and Elf's article was great! Trust a former Gower's Field mod to start in that section for a tour! ;) The ads were cute, too!

Good job as editor, Lucy! :D

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Posted: Mon Feb 27, 2006 10:33 pm 
I love the \:D/ smiley
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Great Job everyone! wow! that was awsom!

I wanna be a times writer! :pray:

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Great job, Lucy P! :hug: I love all your little commentary bits! \:D/
Yayness for the OT team! *energetic high-fives all around*


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It was great!


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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 6:35 am 
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Wow, that was an awesome issue! \:D/

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Great job, OT team! We pulled together! \:D/
Go, Lucy! Go, Lucy! Go, Lucy! Go, Lucy! (That was cheesy, but you really did do a great job! :D )

Congratulations to all Apprentices'! You did great! \:D/

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Great issue

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Awesome issue! I love all the new content! Before, it was too little. :(

Great job! =D>


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Thanks so much for the compliments guys, but I couldn't have pulled it all together if it weren't for the rest of you (of course... :D)!! The commentary bits come from Frank's own wonderful issue, so it's not completely my idea -- applause for Frank! :)

Quote:


Great job, OT team! We pulled together!
Yes!

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Was that all of the Crestwood Avenue Guide? :-s

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Great issue! I really enjoyed it! =D>


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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2006 11:42 pm 
sn33ky hobbitses
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No, this week was only the graphic shop guides. If I missed something, please tell me!

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All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. John 6:37
Lucy is my twin Laura Ingalls = l33t ~*Robin Baggins/Respectahobbit*~


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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 7:34 pm 
Trank Tank Driver
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Well, smilies are kind of graphics, but you can include me in the next one.

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Posted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 10:39 pm 
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I would like to point out that the Blackgaard Gallery is run by Felicity-- all proceeds go to her. :-)

The entire Blackgaard Clan (Felicity included) owns Blackgaard and Associates, and 10% of our proceeds goes into the Blackgaard Clan Account (or at least it will, once we find it again!).

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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 9:14 am 
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I liked it... & it had my AD! YAY!

-Robo

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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 10:26 am 
I'll catch up to Bren!
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Yeah thats like so brilliant anD great.

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Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 7:59 pm 
sn33ky hobbitses
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Sorry DanP and Rachael! :-# I fixed up the part about the Blackgaard Gallery, so that should be a bit better. :) DanP, I'll have your shop on the next issue! Sorry about the mistake!

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All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out. John 6:37
Lucy is my twin Laura Ingalls = l33t ~*Robin Baggins/Respectahobbit*~


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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 2:58 pm 
de lah rutheh rank
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just realized that she has a status to write in...ooOOoohh

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Yay!! I think that was the best one yet!! I loved the Ads!!


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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2006 3:34 pm 
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Lucy Pevensie wrote:
Sorry DanP and Rachael! :-# I fixed up the part about the Blackgaard Gallery, so that should be a bit better. :) DanP, I'll have your shop on the next issue! Sorry about the mistake!


Don't worry. I know it gets confusing. :-)

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