The Town of Odyssey

We hear that phrase from parents or from those we are in a relationship with. What do you think of saying that to an online friend. For the girls, is it akward if a guy says it? With older people I could see where it might be an issue but I'm curious what you guys think.

However awkward saying "I love you" may be, we can always fix it by tacking "as a brother/sister in Christ" onto the end.

But yeah, unless it's within a pretty specific context or something, I would personally find it rather awkward. Someone who's less reserved than me could consider it totally normal, though, so it might just boil down to a personal thing.

I think it's really awkward if it's a guy/girl thing, I can't speak for all girls, but I don't want some guy that I met online telling me he loves me. Just no.

I love all my friends online..Though to have a guy say " I love you " might draw the wrong conclusions.. I say I love you to my girl friends, Not to the guys though. I understand if I have known them for like ever, Then personally I don't mind. Still.. It might be a bit awkward. So I rather not have them say " I love you ". ^-^

One of my female friends always says "I love you" when we say goodbye. She knows I care about her, but I always say something less romantic in return. To me, "I love you" is reserved for a committed relationship (marriage, engagement or AT LEAST serious dating/courtship). I don't really have any reason to think this; I just have weird standards.

Even if you don't mean anything romantic, Bren, the other person is probably going to be confused and/or weirded out.

I say "I love you" to my online female friends. I don't think I have have ever said it to an online male friend, but I have said it to male friends I know personally. I think one must be careful when it comes to online communication. When you say "I love you" in person, your friend can read your facial expression and your body language to know exactly what you mean by that. Online that sentence could easily be misinterpreted. So, just be careful who you say it to. It doesn't matter if he/she is an online friend or a personal friend; Make sure you know that person well, and that person knows you well and knows where your relationship/friendship stands.

I say I love you to a lot of my guy friends. No homo.

UNCLEBITTLES wrote:I say I love you to a lot of my guy friends. No homo.

That's what I do sometimes

I'm more inclined to tell a friend I love them than a girl I'm in a relationship with. >_>

I would tell my girlfriend that I love her

IF I HAD ONE.

It ain't worth it son. They all end up being crazy after a while.

I LOVE YOU ALL.

I say 'I love you' to my dog and he always looks weirded out.

I had a situation where a girl was all over me with "I love you"s and....other things. o_O I was kinda weirded out, and it went on for months. But then she went to college and got together with someone a week later. -_- It was kinda pathetic. But at the same time I'm like "PHEW...!" XD I think it's safe to say that she didn't really mean those "I love you"s. I think she was all over me simply because she liked rock...And I looked like a rocker...I guess. -_-

This is why we don't listen to rock music in my household.

I think that many people use the term both very sincerely and very frivolously, depending on the situation. Speaking from personal experience, I know that a lot of times girls will tell each other how much they love each other as a sort of "do unto others" strategy towards boosting one's self-esteem; if you wish for friends who are loving and accepting, then you're going to do everything you can to be that kind of friend to other people. It's kind of the same mentality behind selfie comments: because I want someone to tell me I'm beautiful, I'm going to comment on other girls' pictures. I guess it's because we're subconsciously trying to set a trend, like if we're super gushy and esteem-building towards others, they'll feel obligated to return the favor. The super-shallow "I love you"s in romantic relationships are basically an extension of this phenomenon, at least on the girl's part. On the other hand, the same kind of person who insecurely tells everyone how much they love them (e.g., my younger self) can also use the words quite sincerely in different situations. After all, I don't tell my parents that I love them every day because I'm insecure about their affections, I do it because, well, I love them. It's not the same, compulsive, if-I-do-this-they'll-do-it-back mentality that a lot of people have with friendships and dating relationships, it's based on trust and affection.

Coming back to the original question of whether or not it's awkward if a guy tells you they love you. Well, generally speaking, yeah. I mean, some guys seem to do the same platonic self-validation that I just described, but with most guys they don't usually just throw those words around unless they're in a romantic relationship (That is, unless all you guys secretly go around bromancing each other and I was just never informed. ), and unless the relationship has progressed to the point where it's the same, secure love that I just described, then yes, them saying such a thing would be very awkward indeed. It's cool if your fiance tells you how much they love you; not so much if it's your one guy friend who kind of has a crush on you that you're pretending that you're oblivious to.

Amethystic wrote:not so much if it's your one guy friend who kind of has a crush on you that you're pretending that you're oblivious to.

May I just say that this is one of the best statements I have ever seen on the internet; you basically summed up the way I live my life around any guy that I suspect of having underlying affection for me. (Overall I have been spared this situation, but there have been a few times when I have played dumb to the best of my ability.)

Anyway, on the topic at hand, I do often use variants of the words "I love you" in reference to my friends (although I only use that phrase online here on the ToO) and coworkers, but I always do it in humorous context. Therefore, I'm not bothered when people use a variant of that phrase in reference to me, provided that I know them and that the context is clear.

Aeva wrote:

Amethystic wrote:not so much if it's your one guy friend who kind of has a crush on you that you're pretending that you're oblivious to.

May I just say that this is one of the best statements I have ever seen on the internet; you basically summed up the way I live my life around any guy that I suspect of having underlying affection for me. (Overall I have been spared this situation, but there have been a few times when I have played dumb to the best of my ability.)

I'm glad I'm not the only one who does this.