Odyssey Character Quotes
"I changed the letters in your Dad’s name on the sign out front of the church. Now it says, 'Preaching this Sunday: Large Rag Boy.'"
There's something so true about bored kids in that quote that I like.
Next character: Eugene
There's something so true about bored kids in that quote that I like.
Next character: Eugene
"I'm a science student, and might I say in all modesty, a recognized genius at Campbell County Community College."
Next character: Bernard Walton
Next character: Bernard Walton
ToO siblings: Donna Blackbeard, Perron, Evil Chick, American Eagle, Stubborn, Shadowfax, and thelordismyshepherd (aka Anna), but StrongNChrist is my twin!
StrongNChrist, deceased 03-25-11, requiescat in pace
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- Gold Member
- Posts: 61
- Joined: March 2021
- Gender:
Tom Riley: Are you doin' experiments on someone else, Whit?
Bernard Walton: It's that man from the NIH, isn't it? You two had a tussle and you've thrown him into the machine!
John Whittaker: Oh, Bernard, you're being ridiculous.
Bernard Walton: No, no, no, I was being ridiculous when I agreed to this idea twelve hours ago. Now I'm being absurd!
Next character: Bryan Dern
Bernard Walton: It's that man from the NIH, isn't it? You two had a tussle and you've thrown him into the machine!
John Whittaker: Oh, Bernard, you're being ridiculous.
Bernard Walton: No, no, no, I was being ridiculous when I agreed to this idea twelve hours ago. Now I'm being absurd!
Next character: Bryan Dern
- Patterson
- Tallying up
- Posts: 138
- Joined: April 2020
- Location: Gnarnia, with a G for copyright reasons
Dern: Okay, let's take another caller. We're playing the "What could possibly be more annoying than this music" game. Caller, go ahead.
Caller: Getting your teeth drilled?
Dern: Wrongo! Next caller.
Caller2: How about those zit cream commercials?
Dern: Wrong Again. Next caller.
Caller3: Uh, if you really hate polka so much, you should turn to Q94, they got some great music and you could win a big screen tv in their mystery items contest.
*Silence*
Caller3: Hello?
Dern: Ohh, I think we have a winner. My friend, YOU are more annoying than this music!
Caller3: Cool! Do I win something?
Next Character: George Barclay
Caller: Getting your teeth drilled?
Dern: Wrongo! Next caller.
Caller2: How about those zit cream commercials?
Dern: Wrong Again. Next caller.
Caller3: Uh, if you really hate polka so much, you should turn to Q94, they got some great music and you could win a big screen tv in their mystery items contest.
*Silence*
Caller3: Hello?
Dern: Ohh, I think we have a winner. My friend, YOU are more annoying than this music!
Caller3: Cool! Do I win something?
Next Character: George Barclay
"Patterson! You're alive!" "No, I'm not Patterson. I'm his uh... brother, uh... Shmatterson!"
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Patterson, that is one of my favourite Dern scenes from one of my favourite episodes! Nice call!
Donna Barclay: Dad, you're lost aren't you?
George Barclay: Lost? Me? George Rand McNally Barclay lost? Honey, hand me the map.
- The Barclay Family Ski Vacation
I think a few of us can relate to this situation.
Next character: Doris Rathbone
Donna Barclay: Dad, you're lost aren't you?
George Barclay: Lost? Me? George Rand McNally Barclay lost? Honey, hand me the map.
- The Barclay Family Ski Vacation
I think a few of us can relate to this situation.
Next character: Doris Rathbone
- Parakeet
- My posts are revolutionary
- Posts: 381
- Joined: December 2016
- Location: A galaxy far, far away...
"I shaved my legs! All the way up to my knees!"
Honestly for some reason I am always surprised that this was in an episode but I always find it so funny (and slightly relatable...)
Next character: Arthur Dent
Honestly for some reason I am always surprised that this was in an episode but I always find it so funny (and slightly relatable...)
Next character: Arthur Dent
Don't you
remember
the SNOWFLAKES.
remember
the SNOWFLAKES.
I can't resist...
"I saved the world!" - the amazing and heroic Arthur Dent
Next character: Lucy Cunningham-Schultz
"I saved the world!" - the amazing and heroic Arthur Dent
Next character: Lucy Cunningham-Schultz
- Patterson
- Tallying up
- Posts: 138
- Joined: April 2020
- Location: Gnarnia, with a G for copyright reasons
It was hard to think of a funny Lucy quote.
Jill: "I know all about this camp like the back of my hand. My uncle's the caretaker."
Lucy: "Oh, is he the guy that rides around on that little tractor and spits tobacco juice everywhere?"
Jill: "Yeah, that's him."
*edit Do I need a different one? I seem to have killed the thread.
Next Character: Trent DeWhite
Jill: "I know all about this camp like the back of my hand. My uncle's the caretaker."
Lucy: "Oh, is he the guy that rides around on that little tractor and spits tobacco juice everywhere?"
Jill: "Yeah, that's him."
*edit Do I need a different one? I seem to have killed the thread.
Next Character: Trent DeWhite
"Patterson! You're alive!" "No, I'm not Patterson. I'm his uh... brother, uh... Shmatterson!"
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- Wod Fam Choc Sod
- Not as new
- Posts: 38
- Joined: July 2021
- Gender:
- Contact:
Bernard Walton: Well, that wasn't the end of Saul's story, but do you get the point by now?
Trent DeWhite: Yeah! Cut off the bad guy's head when God says to!
Bernard Walton: Exactly, d—no! Try again.
Trent DeWhite: Don't throw spears at harpists?
Trent DeWhite: I was asked to join the biology club. We do experiments and help other kids with biology projects. And we're the only group allowed to touch the skeletons. I know it sounds nerdy, but it's kind of an honor to be asked because skeletons aren't cheap.
Robert Mitchell: I wouldn't sell mine for anything.
Next Character: Jack Allen
Trent DeWhite: Yeah! Cut off the bad guy's head when God says to!
Bernard Walton: Exactly, d—no! Try again.
Trent DeWhite: Don't throw spears at harpists?
Trent DeWhite: I was asked to join the biology club. We do experiments and help other kids with biology projects. And we're the only group allowed to touch the skeletons. I know it sounds nerdy, but it's kind of an honor to be asked because skeletons aren't cheap.
Robert Mitchell: I wouldn't sell mine for anything.
Next Character: Jack Allen
Read Odyssey's latest epic: The Checkmate Saga!!!
https://juliettederouledewrites.blogspo ... kmate.html
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Connie: (whispering) Oh, she looks beautiful, doesn't she?
Jason: (also whispering) Beautiful.
Connie: (tearfully) Everyone looks beautiful!
Jason: Yes, Connie, they're all beautiful.
Connie: Your dad. Oh... he looks great in that tuxedo. He's... oh... he's...
Jason: Beautiful.
Connie: (still fighting tears) Yeah. And Katrina in that dress...
Jason: She got her stitches out just in time.
Connie: (quavering) I think I'm gonna cry.
Jason: Here's my hankie.
Connie: *sniffs* Thank you.
Jason: I knew all along, by the way.
Connie: Well, good for you. Can I cry now, or are you gonna keep talking?
Jason: Have a good cry.
Connie: (sobbing) Thank you. *dramatic sobs* *blows nose*
https://juliettederouledewrites.blogspo ... kmate.html
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Connie: (whispering) Oh, she looks beautiful, doesn't she?
Jason: (also whispering) Beautiful.
Connie: (tearfully) Everyone looks beautiful!
Jason: Yes, Connie, they're all beautiful.
Connie: Your dad. Oh... he looks great in that tuxedo. He's... oh... he's...
Jason: Beautiful.
Connie: (still fighting tears) Yeah. And Katrina in that dress...
Jason: She got her stitches out just in time.
Connie: (quavering) I think I'm gonna cry.
Jason: Here's my hankie.
Connie: *sniffs* Thank you.
Jason: I knew all along, by the way.
Connie: Well, good for you. Can I cry now, or are you gonna keep talking?
Jason: Have a good cry.
Connie: (sobbing) Thank you. *dramatic sobs* *blows nose*
- Patterson
- Tallying up
- Posts: 138
- Joined: April 2020
- Location: Gnarnia, with a G for copyright reasons
Jason Whittaker: Jack, why didn't you just tie me up and lock me in a closet?
Jack Allen: I didn't realize that was an option.
Next Character: Doris Rathbone
Jack Allen: I didn't realize that was an option.
Next Character: Doris Rathbone
"Patterson! You're alive!" "No, I'm not Patterson. I'm his uh... brother, uh... Shmatterson!"
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"Welcome to our humble commode!"
Next: Detective Polehause
Next: Detective Polehause
ToO siblings: Donna Blackbeard, Perron, Evil Chick, American Eagle, Stubborn, Shadowfax, and thelordismyshepherd (aka Anna), but StrongNChrist is my twin!
StrongNChrist, deceased 03-25-11, requiescat in pace
- Patterson
- Tallying up
- Posts: 138
- Joined: April 2020
- Location: Gnarnia, with a G for copyright reasons
Whit: Detective, I've been thinking about Trickle Lake Concrete.
Don Polehaus: Yeah? And sometimes I think about large balls of lint, what about it?
Next Character: Nick Mulligan
Don Polehaus: Yeah? And sometimes I think about large balls of lint, what about it?
Next Character: Nick Mulligan
"Patterson! You're alive!" "No, I'm not Patterson. I'm his uh... brother, uh... Shmatterson!"
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"Yeah, well, Ronald McDonald 'catches one's attention' too, y'know."
Next character: Tamika Washington
Next character: Tamika Washington
- Ingress Neverwhere
- Resident Perditorian
- Posts: 362
- Joined: March 2009
- Location: on the Shining Isle of Anniera
"My back hurt so bad that I couldn't stand completely straight for a week. Marvin thought it was hilarious and kept calling me "Quasimodo"."
Next character: Jason Whittaker
Next character: Jason Whittaker
The Bible that is falling apart belongs to the person who isn't.
But nobody else is gonna put it right for me,
Nobody but me is gonna change my story!
Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty!
- Wod Fam Choc Sod
- Not as new
- Posts: 38
- Joined: July 2021
- Gender:
- Contact:
Jason Whittaker: I could say I'm a kumquat, but that doesn't make me one.
Jack Allen: But it's obvious you're not a kumquat.
Jason Whittaker: Walter, what's going on here?
Walter Madison: All I can conclude is that we are in the middle of a spiritual battle.
Jason Whittaker: Spiritual battle, alright. Seems to be a lot of that going around lately. I was in the middle of one in South America recently and believe me, I have learned my lesson. I know exactly what to do.
Walter Madison: What's that?
Jason Whittaker: Drop to our knees right now and pray.
Walter Madison: I agree.
*DING*
Jason Whittaker: I think I just had an idea.
John Whittaker: No, that was my cell phone. I think I just got a text message.
John Whittaker: Do you think that was wise, Jason?
Jason Whittaker: What do you mean?
John Whittaker: Basically, you just sent Eugene on a mission to storm someone else's wedding. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me.
Jason Whittaker: Yeah, you could be right. I just wish I could be there to see it.
LOL sorry. When it comes to Odyssey quotes, sometimes I get carried away...
Next Character: Jay Smouse
Jack Allen: But it's obvious you're not a kumquat.
Jason Whittaker: Walter, what's going on here?
Walter Madison: All I can conclude is that we are in the middle of a spiritual battle.
Jason Whittaker: Spiritual battle, alright. Seems to be a lot of that going around lately. I was in the middle of one in South America recently and believe me, I have learned my lesson. I know exactly what to do.
Walter Madison: What's that?
Jason Whittaker: Drop to our knees right now and pray.
Walter Madison: I agree.
*DING*
Jason Whittaker: I think I just had an idea.
John Whittaker: No, that was my cell phone. I think I just got a text message.
John Whittaker: Do you think that was wise, Jason?
Jason Whittaker: What do you mean?
John Whittaker: Basically, you just sent Eugene on a mission to storm someone else's wedding. Sounds like a recipe for disaster to me.
Jason Whittaker: Yeah, you could be right. I just wish I could be there to see it.
LOL sorry. When it comes to Odyssey quotes, sometimes I get carried away...
Next Character: Jay Smouse
Read Odyssey's latest epic: The Checkmate Saga!!!
https://juliettederouledewrites.blogspo ... kmate.html
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Connie: (whispering) Oh, she looks beautiful, doesn't she?
Jason: (also whispering) Beautiful.
Connie: (tearfully) Everyone looks beautiful!
Jason: Yes, Connie, they're all beautiful.
Connie: Your dad. Oh... he looks great in that tuxedo. He's... oh... he's...
Jason: Beautiful.
Connie: (still fighting tears) Yeah. And Katrina in that dress...
Jason: She got her stitches out just in time.
Connie: (quavering) I think I'm gonna cry.
Jason: Here's my hankie.
Connie: *sniffs* Thank you.
Jason: I knew all along, by the way.
Connie: Well, good for you. Can I cry now, or are you gonna keep talking?
Jason: Have a good cry.
Connie: (sobbing) Thank you. *dramatic sobs* *blows nose*
https://juliettederouledewrites.blogspo ... kmate.html
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Connie: (whispering) Oh, she looks beautiful, doesn't she?
Jason: (also whispering) Beautiful.
Connie: (tearfully) Everyone looks beautiful!
Jason: Yes, Connie, they're all beautiful.
Connie: Your dad. Oh... he looks great in that tuxedo. He's... oh... he's...
Jason: Beautiful.
Connie: (still fighting tears) Yeah. And Katrina in that dress...
Jason: She got her stitches out just in time.
Connie: (quavering) I think I'm gonna cry.
Jason: Here's my hankie.
Connie: *sniffs* Thank you.
Jason: I knew all along, by the way.
Connie: Well, good for you. Can I cry now, or are you gonna keep talking?
Jason: Have a good cry.
Connie: (sobbing) Thank you. *dramatic sobs* *blows nose*
- ASmouseInTheHouse
- Lurker
- Posts: 8
- Joined: September 2020
- Location: Some little corner of the world
- Gender:
- Contact:
Ellis Cowanga: Ah, funeral home jokes. They never get old!
Jay Smouse: Nope, they just die.
-Not What I Expected
Next Character: Hadley Bassett
Jay Smouse: Nope, they just die.
-Not What I Expected
Next Character: Hadley Bassett
Hadley Bassett: So, you heard it here first, folks! A Comic-Connellsville Exclusive, with me, Hadley Bassett, bringing you…uh, is this thing on?
Wooton Bassett: Uh, yeah, I think we’re done. Ok, thanks everybody!
-The Ties That Bind, Part 3
Wooton Bassett: Uh, yeah, I think we’re done. Ok, thanks everybody!
-The Ties That Bind, Part 3
- Ingress Neverwhere
- Resident Perditorian
- Posts: 362
- Joined: March 2009
- Location: on the Shining Isle of Anniera
"It has everything to do with Wooton! All my life, I've heard nothing but praise about him! 'Be more like Wooton,' they said; 'You're an underachiever,' they said. 'Eat more licorice', they said! But I'm me! And me happens to be a loser."
Bill Kendall
Bill Kendall
The Bible that is falling apart belongs to the person who isn't.
But nobody else is gonna put it right for me,
Nobody but me is gonna change my story!
Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty!
"You may not believe this, but I still do love your mother."
Rusty Gordon.
Rusty Gordon.
- Patterson
- Tallying up
- Posts: 138
- Joined: April 2020
- Location: Gnarnia, with a G for copyright reasons
Rusty: Here's some money, Mr. Whittaker. Uh, keep the change.
Whit: Uh, thanks, Rusty.
Sam Johnson: They're up to something...
Whit: They sure are. He was 15 cents short.
Grady McKay
Whit: Uh, thanks, Rusty.
Sam Johnson: They're up to something...
Whit: They sure are. He was 15 cents short.
Grady McKay
"Patterson! You're alive!" "No, I'm not Patterson. I'm his uh... brother, uh... Shmatterson!"
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- Ingress Neverwhere
- Resident Perditorian
- Posts: 362
- Joined: March 2009
- Location: on the Shining Isle of Anniera
"Hey, Rodney! Why don't you pick on someone your own IQ? Oh wait, you did—a squirrel."
Nathanial Graham
Nathanial Graham
The Bible that is falling apart belongs to the person who isn't.
But nobody else is gonna put it right for me,
Nobody but me is gonna change my story!
Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty!